Spencer Butte in Eugene is a rather large mountain with a rather magnificent view. It’s known for its amazing views, its wildlife, and its poison oak. Although it’s the big brother of the ever-popular Skinner Butte, also in Eugene, its climb is still quite easy. And that’s what we were counting on when my uncle, my brother, my mom and I went to the mountain. I’m fairly familiar with the trail, since one of my friends always used to include the climb as part of her birthday party. I was fairly certain that we could all handle the trail. And we were able to handle it. But some poorly-marked trails – and a daredevil uncle – made it a bit harder than we’d expected.

At the beginning of the trail, there was a little marker that denoted the trails. It told you that you could go up the easy trail – which was rather long – or the steep, tricky trail, which was shorter. My uncle wanted to go up the shorter one, so we went up, dragging my little brother behind us. It was quite a bit harder than the easy trail that I remembered, with large rocks and very steep slopes. There was a rewarding view at the top, but it was still quite tricky.

We knew that we couldn’t go back down the same trail that we went up, since steepness is a lot worse going down than up. We needed to find the easier trail down, but strangely it was unmarked, as was the steep trail. We (well, my talkative uncle) had to ask someone where the easy trail was. Fortunately, we eventually found it. The very end of the easy trail (the beginning, going down) was almost as hard as the steep trail, but it got better as we went down, and it later turned into a quite beautiful, fun, easy trail. We did get lost once, owing to a strange little red herring of a trail that seemed to lead somewhere but didn’t go anywhere except the woods. Due to this, my little brother and my uncle beat us to the bottom of the hill, which was a bit embarrassing. But it was worth it for the time we spent while lost, chatting and enjoying nature.

Overall, Spencer Butte is a fun, easy climb, good for amateurs who want a little exercise and a little chance to chat. Well, as long as you take the right path. And it might be good to have a GPS handy.

(Oh, this promo pic. What a bad, bad choice. I'm about to praise this album to a ridiculous extent, and you know as well as I do that I love Doctor Who, but what a bad choice. It looks like Doccy's stolen Amy's leg, and River looks like some sort of Ice Queen, and there are thunderbolts everywhere for some reason, and everyone's been sharpened beyond belief. Yuck.)

The composer for Doctor Who has been (since 2005 – the beginning of NuWho) a lovely fellow named Murray Gold. If you’ve ever watched Doctor Who, you probably know his themes, even if you don’t realize it – Eleven’s epic and eccentric theme I Am The Doctor, Nine and Ten’s little tragedy of a theme, even Ten’s dramatic (and overblown for some) regeneration song Vale Decem. Those are the famous ones, but Murray is pretty amazing in almost every track. (A few of my favorite “little pieces”: here, here, and here.) And he’s gotten even better than he was before. Sure, there are definitely some extremely notable ones that just jump out at you, and some that are less amazing on the first listen, but with a lot of listening you can come to appreciate the hidden complexity of each and every one.

Murray’s gotten a lot of crap in the past for two main things: being too overblown, and using his main themes, or leitmotifs, as he likes to call them, way too often. And sure, he does like to incorporate “I Am The Doctor” into things. On this album and the last, I could probably count at least 20 songs that have some bit of it in it. But it is a great song. It sums up an awful lot about Eleven so succinctly. It says what it might take 3,000 words to normally say, or a couple episodes, in 4 minutes and 4 seconds, and it’s also extremely catchy. I agree with Murray on leitmotifs – they’re an effective and succinct aural language. They can make a great moment on the screen have so much more meaning and vice versa. In this album, he does a lot to make “I Am The Doctor” and “The Mad Man With A Box” even more powerful than it was before, by associating it with Lake Silencio and other angsty situations.

As for songs being too overblown? Pssh! It’s Doctor Who, for Rassilon’s sake! I mean, I adore it, but it’s not a show about realism. Eleven brought a lot of subtlety and class to the show, but it is what it is, and what it is is fanciful and lovely and stylized. (Too many ises in that sentence. Sixie would not be pleased.) You could do plenty of fan videos set to Muse to it. That’s all you need to know.

The actual album is organized by episode, helpfully. There are about 5 songs per episode, more or less (there are actually 65 songs on the album, which is 13 x 5). However, the length of the songs varies wildly, from 44 seconds to 4 minutes, 55 seconds. This helps to stop the album from feeling monotonous. You could conceivably listen to the whole album (in fact, I have – twice), something that’s strange for most OSTs.

The fact that it’s performed with a full orchestra is imperative. It makes the album sound extremely big and epic, and just really high-quality. For example, the violins on “The Enigma Of River Song” are absolutely amazing. Also, the choir adds a lot to the whole vibe of it. The shimmering and slightly spooky “Melody Pond” would be nothing without the choral bits.

Of course, the album won’t be nearly as good if you don’t actually watch the show. In fact, it won’t be as wonderful as it is to me if you aren’t slightly obsessed with the show. “Enigma Of River Song” won’t be nearly as good if you don’t recognize the scene it appears in (snog in LKH) and are a bit of a Doccy/River shipper. “My Time Is Running Out” probably won’t make you cry unless you recognize that little soliloquy in “Closing Time”.

And then there are the ones that depend on your knowledge of the leitmotifs established in the Series 5 OST. “Forgiven” is a tearjerker already, being the soundtrack for a bit of Silencio action, but when you realize it has River’s theme (“A River Of Tears” (Murray likes really sad puns)) mixed with a bit of an edited (read: more angsty) version of Doccy’s… well. As a shipper, you might just explode with terribly angsty/romantic sadness/happiness. Or, as the Tumblrites like to say, “I JUST HAVE SO MANY FEELINGS!”

There are a lot of songs on here, so here are the ones to listen to first:

(Note: All the songs are composed incredibly well, and every one, I think, is impressive musically. But the ones that pull my heartstrings, and thus attract my ears, are associated with the main arc, with main character-based stuff.  You really should listen to the whole album.)

1. “1969″/”The Impossible Astronaut” Together, these songs really set the frightening and sad, yet strangely beautiful tone of the Doctor’s death scene in “The Impossible Astronaut”. And even without the context, the beautiful mix of the instruments and the choral singing is absolutely brilliant.

2. “Help Is On The Way” Wow. This track is a proper theme for the America two-parter – at once menacing and reassuring, a great romp and a thriller. Definitely knocks me off my feet.

3. “Run, Sexy” Very effective and creepy at the beginning, then turns into a nice little action theme. Rather simple, but that’s often best.

4. “The Chemical Castle”/”Which One Is The Flesh?”/“Scanning Me” These songs are all part of the Cloney Time two-parter, so they naturally go together. And though I really didn’t like Cloney Time, I really do like Murray’s music for it. “Scanning Me” is my favorite, creepy and a little sad.

5. “Melody Pond” Oh, the feelings. The chorus, minor keys, and distinctly hummable bits all combine to create a very lovely and shippy experience.

6. “The Enigma Of River Song” (My massive ship isn’t affecting this list at all.) My favorite song of the album. Epic and tragic and OH THE VIOLINS. That Celtic-ish jig that turns into the violin and piano bit… brilliant. 

7. “The Hotel Prison” This song (and the whole “God Complex” soundtrack) gets kudos simply because it’s so weird. The funky, dischordant notes, whatever instrument they’re using, the computer-generated bits, the Muzak/hotel music influence… it all comes together to create something that probably shouldn’t work, but does.

8. “Definitely Going” I’ve got to appreciate this one because it’s so sweet. One of the only songs on here that makes you go and say “Awwwwww…”

9. “Brigadier Lethbridge-Stewart” Without context, this is some sad and beautiful stuff that transitions into an epic rendition of “I Am The Doctor”. With context, this is the Doctor going from “I’m never gonna die. There’s still tons of stuff to do, like go to all of Jack’s stag parties” to “Well, maybe all of Jack’s stag parties is a little crazy. And all my old UNIT friends are dead, so I suppose I’ll nip off and die now.” And that gives it a completely different meaning. The epic “I Am The Doctor” reprise isn’t “Let’s have awesome adventures,” it’s “Let’s go die!” And that makes it a lot more special and interesting to me.

10. “Forgiven” Hullo, giant shipper here, what else was I going to choose? Like I mentioned before, “Forgiven” is a brilliant and heartbreaking mix of Doccy’s theme and River’s.

The Doctor Who Series 6 OST is an absolutely brilliant mix of music that’s surprisingly (for soundtracks) easy to listen to as an album. There’s some great composing by Murray Gold here, but it probably won’t appeal to you if you aren’t a big fan of the show. If you are, go out and buy it, pronto! And if you’re a pseudo-classical music fan, I suggest you give it a listen anyway. (There’s some on YouTube here, but it probably won’t be up for long – darn BBC Worldwide is interested in protecting its copyright for some reason.)

Today’s villain: flats.

“Night Terrors”, by Mark Gatiss, is a run-of-the-mill romp, right? Silly, positively rubbish villains…

The fact that they were creepy as hell didn’t prevent me from shouting at the screen “Oi, Gatiss! Creepy dolls? Really?”

Check! River Song-less, angst-free, and seemingly random plot concerning alien kids, Doccy as a Social Services man, and a companion detour?

Doctor Who: Now starring Rory Williams, Amy Pond, and – most importantly – Amy Pond’s hair.

Checkity-check! Guy being eaten by his carpet?

No comment.

Big check.

In every respect, it seems that Night Terrors is a silly, throwaway rompity-romp. Not terrible, but certainly not necessary. Right?

LOLno.

Of course not! Night Terrors has a lot of the qualities of a romp, and it’s certainly not the highlight of Series 6, but I think it’s absolutely necessary for the overall season. A few little things make it better than your average romp.

Awwwww…

Firstly, its themes are relevant to S6. Whereas the pirate episode was about pirates, blessings in disguise, treasure, Doccy in a pirate hat, vague Doctor/TARDIS, and more pirates, this one’s about a father accepting his alien son and about that alien son facing his fears. (Weeeealll, it’s also about Amy and Rory romping about for about half the episode attempting to fight rubbish creepy dolls, and grandmas and slackers being sucked into dollhouses by inanimate objects…but still.) The father accepting his alien son bit acts as a sort of sweet footnote to A Good Man Goes To War and Let’s Kill Hitler – how Amy and Rory could possibly accept River as their daughter. The answer is, of course, with love, time, and the Doctor. It continues on the theme of parenthood in a very ood situation, but it treats the idea in a nicer way than AGMGTW or LKH.

You didn’t think you were going to get out of an episode without some Silencio angst, did you now, Doccy?

Night Terrors also acts as one big ol’ metaphor for the arc of the whole season – Doccy’s death! You see, it’s about a little boy facing his fears for the greater good. Understandably, Doccy is scared of Lake Silencio, and (as we’ll see in The Wedding Of River Song) it is indeed for the greater good.

And what else can we call Eleven but an ancient five-year-old?

Secondly, this episode contains one of the finest examples of pure, condensed Doctor-ness in all of DW. If I wanted to show someone who Eleven was – the little boy, the Oncoming Storm, the strange, alien being – I’d probably show them this episode to begin with.

Tip for grandmothers everywhere: don’t try to solicit the 900 year-old alien to take out your trash.

He enthusiastically knocked on people’s doors, but unenthusiastically refused to do community service.

He was a surprisingly good fake Social Services guy, sweet and dark at the same time.

Kids, eh?

He had proper fun with a fellow little boy…

Oh dear.

And thanks to that little boy, became genuinely scared of a closet.

The Doctor: going into your house and claiming your fridge for himself.

Doccy then had a few lovely comedic scenes concerning tea and closets and whatnot, which you really should just watch. He’s supremely entertaining in them.

(For some extra entertainment, I suggest clicking the “Transcribe Audio” button. It’s a hilarious fail on YouTube’s part.)

Of course, he’s got to have his speech. He is the Doctor, after all. Again, I suggest you just watch this one. It is the main thing that made this episode so very, er, Doccy-licious.

(Ah, I adore this effect.)

The little boy and his father played their parts very well. They were adorable and tragic at times, and properly pulled my heartstrings. Nothing amazing, but quite sweet.

Of course, the part of the episode that wasn’t the alien kid and his dad’s adorable journey was entirely unremarkable, hearkening back to Classic Who by being rather boring and seemingly violent.

YOU CAN’T EAT THE OLD LADY!

But… no!

I saw no reason why the guy with the dog or the old lady had to be eaten by various inanimate objects. Sure, they came back at the end, but that didn’t make it any less pointless.

“We’re dead. Again.”
Lovely line, Rory, I’ll give you that.

Unfortunately, Amy and Rory’s little detour in the rubbish dollhouse was boring and rather odd. Having them do nothing but run around trying to fight off the rather rubbish dolls was disappointing, especially compared with Doccy’s fun and tragic home visit. I wish Gatiss could have found something more interesting to do with them.

Team TARDIS.

Though “Night Terrors” may seem like a throwaway romp, it’s… uh, a throwaway romp with thematic significance, a heartwarming tale of parenthood, and concentrated Eleven-ness. It’s also respite before the next episodes, which are both rather bleak episodes compared to this one. Although it’s not the most remarkable episode of Series 6, it’s a nice episode, and certainly worth your time.

I write album reviews now. Album reviews are cool.

 The Chapters are an Irish band composed of members Ross McNally, Simon Eustace, Turlough Gunawardhana, Michael Murphy, and Ciaran Fortune whose notable sounds are a heavy use of synthesizer and a rather odd-sounding main vocalist. The band describes its sound as “Rumours era Fleetwood Mac singing at a party hosted by Talking Heads, gatecrashed by The Cars, throw in a bit of Phoenix and a wink to The Band”. The comparisons are pretty apt – they do have about 3/4 of the spirit of Talking Heads and their album has both the monotony and catchiness of Phoenix. However, I don’t like them nearly as much as either.

Are they particularly famous? Well, no. Not in the US, anyway. Their MySpace page seems to paint them as up and coming, but they’ve been up and coming since about 2008. Are they particularly wonderful? Ah, well, uh, no. (But they’re not bad either.) So why are you reviewing this album?

So glad you asked, Omniescent Rhetorical Question-Asking Voice. The band has recently stated on Twitter that their new album is coming out soon-ish. Even though there’s no telling how long that’s supposed to mean, I figure it’s a good time to review their first album, released in 2009.

I found this group because they share a label (3ú) with The Coronas and Mary Black – the latter the singer my parents are obsessed with, the former’s frontman the son of the latter. Clearly, there’s a bit of nepotism going on in this label. That’s all right – it’s a family affair! But the Chapters have no familial relations to the Black/O’Reilly clan. Why include them, eh?

Perhaps because their music is just so fun. The album practically exudes joy, with its bright lyrics, synthesizer aplenty, and fun instrumentation (I think I heard an xylophone back there). The songs are perfectly hummable, poppy, and radio-friendly, with some nice choruses. I can’t exactly describe their lyrics, as I can’t understand half of what they’re saying through the electronica haze. But in the songs I do understand, the lyrics are solid – vibrant descriptions and emotional repeated phrases make for a well-rounded song.

(But they're really not that cool.)

There’s some oddness, too, to make the album stand out from the crowd. Only a bit, but enough to make the album worth a second glance. The lead singer’s voice is less melodic than you’d expect in places and sounds just plain strange enough for me to give him the moniker of “Dave Matthews’ more radio-friendly cousin.” It’s not bad at all for the band, though – in fact, it gives the songs some added depth.

The main problem with this album is that it’s just so hard to listen to the whole thing at once. The songs have a kind of measured monotony: same singing, same instrumentation, same sorts of lyrics. By the end it almost feels like you’re listening to one very long, drawn-out song. Sure, they try to combat that with dark lyrics and minor keys (“Black Room”) and a more acoustic, heart-tugging tone (“Home”) but it doesn’t quite work. They’re not bad songs, but they’re not nearly as good as the songs that are just poppy melodies and catchy choruses, such as “Videotapes” and “Trying To Get Ahead”.

(I did, however, thoroughly enjoy a whole listen-through of the album on a looong flight from Georgia to Oregon… perhaps the songs strike some sort of chord to the bleary-eyed, uncomfortable traveler at what feels like 3 am?)

So go on and have a listen at their MySpace page!  Though it may not change your life, it’ll certainly brighten your mood and might even entice you to buy their album. At the very least, it’ll brighten up your music collection with its technicolor cover.

For those who like this but want a bit more, I would recommend Talking Heads’  ”Stop Making Sense” and Phoenix’s “Wolfgang Amadeus Phoenix”. And, of course, The Chapters’ new album, whenever it comes out.

Isabelle’s rating: 3 and a half stars, or

(The collective fan reaction to the episode.)

Oh my dear, dear giddy aunt. “Let’s Kill Hitler” is a mad, impossible, brilliant, heartbreaking, hilarious spoiler of an episode. As usual with Moffat, it’s flawed, but show-stopping. Spoilers under the cut – because, after all, “You’ve got a time machine. I’ve got a gun. What the hell! Let’s kill Hitler.”

Okay, bad news first…

Look familiar?

Er, Moffat? You’ve already killed the Doctor. Remember? Sure, this has different circumstances (poisoned from a kiss with poison from the Judas Tree? Nice touch, Moffat. Nice touch.) I’m starting to think this is some kind of anger management thing…

What did I ever do to you, Moffat?

Honestly, though, using character death as your main drama device is getting a bit old. It’s superbly acted, of course (and more about that later), but I’m getting tired. If this keeps happening, the show will have to be called “The Ponds”, (a dysfunctional family show, with the tagline “My Daughter Is A Psychopath!”)

The episode opens with a very clever crop circle bit, where the Ponds call the Doctor in an unconventional manner (directly copying one of their daughter’s lines, “You wouldn’t answer your phone.”). It’s certainly a brilliant – and unexpected – way to start the episode.

And here we have the new model, streamlined with a striking red color. Here it is beside a - a - ah, what is that anyway?

Soon enough, the troubled childhood friend of the Ponds – Mels – shows up. When she was released to the public, by the way, everyone thought “Hmm, “Mels” sounds an awful lot like “Melody.” Could it be…. nah, that’s impossible.” And here we are, tricked again by the Moffat brand of double psychology – something obvious is teased, the public thinks that Moffat is too tricky for that – then that exact obvious thing happens, with no twists or turns involved.

I'm Melody, baby.

It’s interesting to think of the options this opens up – particularly, finally the confirmation that regeneration can transcend race. Since regenerating into a different gender has already been confirmed this season, this means there really are a lot more choices for the next Doctor. Not that I really want to consider it yet, since 11 is magnificent.

D'aww.

The childhood versions of Amy, Rory, and Mels were all brilliant, little Rory being one of the most adorable things I’ve seen in a while. Amy thinking that Rory was gay was also pretty hilarious (and Rory’s look just before he runs off is perfect).  Now, of course, save a few quick lines (“The last time I did this, I came out a toddler!”), Melody growing up the same age as her parents is never explained. It’s very timey-wimey, classic Moffat, but right now it doesn’t really make much sense. We can only wait, I suppose…

Melody the Teenage Time Lord.

Mels herself was good, though she hardly got any time to shine. She did seem like River Song, but I’d be unhappy if she had actually replaced Alex Kingston as River. However, she seemed like an actual character instead of just a caricature, which is impressive for the few minutes she had on camera.

The story could have been set anywhere; it just happened to be set in WWII Germany. Hitler was quickly shoved in the cupboard and the one or two Nazi officers we did see were just scenery. Not that I really minded; the River Song antics more than made up for the complete lack of Hitler.

Ooh, look, I'm in a spaceship!

Look, a robot!

Look, lens flare!

This is totally sci-fi!

The justice robot seemed like it was a parody of something, but I don’t know what. Whatever it was, it was certainly trying to make the episode have more action and science fiction elements, but I’m not sure if it worked.

The new Daleks? Yeahh... no.

The adorable little deadly jellyfish were somewhat annoying. Of villains, they weren’t the best, even if they were for comedic effect.

But enough of me jabbering on about my pet peeves of the episode! What “Let’s Kill Hitler” was really about was the fabulous characters. River Song, in particular.

Oh, River, River, River.

This was her episode. She stole the show. She had her own little post-regeneration attack, checking all her body parts and jumping out windows and hitting on the Doctor even more than usual…

Naturally, she tried to kill the Doctor – with a banana -

Always bring a banana to a murder, River.

And later succeeded almost succeeded to kill the Doctor with a kiss.

Smoochie-smoochie time isn't so innocent anymore.

Then she terrorized a few Nazis, using her regeneration energies rather frivolously…

Yes, I am a psychopath. Why do you ask?

And… well… let’s just say that YES, MOFFAT, WE KNOW YOU DID AN ADULT SHOW.

Doctor Who: The only "kids show" that has one of the protagonists encourage others to strip at gunpoint.

She tried on a few outfits (in front of her robot mom, er?)

She nearly rolled her eyes in the corner when her dear old Doccy finally came back:

But she wasn’t rolling her eyes when the justice-bots put her through “hell”.

She was wonderfully terrified in a way that we really haven’t seen her yet, and I loved that.

Rule 7: Never run when you're scared.

And then – the moment where all the Doctor/River shippers squeed their very hardest (including me, dear readers) and where all the non-shippers averted their eyes (or possibly turned the TV off) – the slightly more benign kiss.

THEIR

LOVE

IS

LEGENDARY

Very frivolous with your regeneration energy, River. The fact that this basically makes her mortal makes me a bit sad, because we won’t be seeing Time Lady River. Neither will the Doctor. Finally another Time Lord, and yet she can’t live with him, either. Cue the angst!

Okay.

Speaking of the angst, that, gape, and make funny jokes was basically all the Doctor did this episode. Oh, and dying. But, as ever, he did it wonderfully. A scene-by-scene breakdown of all the brilliant things he did would take about 45 minutes, so I’ll just do a few:

The very Sherlock-esque scene with the banana-gun switch was shot beautifully, and their looks to each other both say “You’re a very impressive arch-enemy, but I’m cleverer” and “Oh, we’re totally in love.”

(I really shouldn't find this funny, but I do.)

*Ahem*…

You will be fine for 31 minutes; you will be dead in 32 minutes.

Even though the “cameos” by previous companions were rubbish in this scene,(GUILT! MORE GUILT!) Amelia-the-hologram was hilarious. Doccy was angsting away (making unintentionally hilarious faces as he did it), and there she was, being her practical little hologram self. I sort of love the way the show made fun of itself there.

You have angered the Scottish, however, Moffat. I thought you were on the Scottish Agenda!

And suddenly… Mood Whiplash!

Even though we've seen the dying Doctor quite enough before, this was quite powerfully angsty - the image of the Oncoming Storm having to crawl.

What an angst muffin.

Oh Doccy, you're so angsty...

However, his slow smile caused by “fish fingers and custard” is heartwarming indeed and quite a sight to behold.

(Incidentally, my mom thinks that 'fish fingers and custard' was sort of a hallucination on the Doctor's part because we never had any concrete evidence that the hologram said it. And why would she? After all, she is not Amelia Pond.)

His re-appearance in the new top hat and niiiice suit and sonic cane is epic, to say the least. I mean, the Doctor saying “Doctor who?” has got to be some kind of magic.

Stumbling around like a giraffe with the sonic cane is hilarious, but of course it quickly grows somber. The Doctor’s Rules are quite funny and they also happen to be easily applicable to everyday life.

Never knowingly. Never knowingly be serious — Rule 27.

Not a rule that you necessarily follow, Doccy, but very good.

It's not a smile anymore, Eleven. It's an odd contortion of your face into an unnatural position.

And there you are, Eleven, there you are, forever perched at your scanner, worrying about one thing or another. Also, you cannot fake a smile.

Amy is pleased. Rory's like "Oh God, my wife still falls for this crap."

The Ponds had a pretty darn small role in this. Sure, Amy hugged the Doctor, and ran away from robot jellyfish, and did some grieving for him, but nothing else.

Same for Rory. Sure, he punched Hitler and shoved him in a cupboard, was possibly the Master, wasn’t gay, rode a motorcycle, tried not to see the entire experience as a metaphor, and above all, didn’t die (it was the Doctor’s turn instead), but… well, actually, those are pretty cool things to do.

I'll have bragging rights for years because of this! Yeah, Doctor, I know you're a Time Lord and all, but I punched Hitler. Ever done that?

Quite lastly:

Dear Sir: A – for effort, F for execution.

Overall, “Let’s Kill Hitler” is a brilliant episode. Sure, it’s flawed, just like every script. I would have liked it with a bit less dying. The evil jellyfish robots were rubbish. But it’s a fun River-licious affair, every Doctor/River shipper’s dream, and plus there is quite possibly more of the gold regeneration effect than in any other episode. And Rory punches Hitler!

What's not to like about that?

On to next week, then, creepy-as-hell dolls and a little boy menaced by them, all written by Moffat’s BFF, Mark Gatiss. And hopefully there’s less dying this time.

Eleven certainly hopes so.

So enjoy!

To quote her, "Hi there!"

The chatbot named A.L.I.C.E. (Artificial Linguistic Internet Computer Entity) is awesome firstly because you can have a semi-coherent conversation with her (here) and she doesn’t contain inappropriate material (*AHEM*). But she’s also awesome because you can have a semi-coherent conversation with her in character. Sometimes you can even glean interesting observations into the world of your fandom from her. Being the Doctor Who fanatic I am, I chatted with her as the Doctor, and it worked. So well. Have a few examples!

A friendship that would last a lifetime... okay, not really. But it could totally work.

It doesn't work as well when I try the Ninth Doctor's opening line on Alice.

Part One of the Pandorica Speech. Inside their spaceships, the Pandorica Alliance were just saying "Charlie Parker. "

Part Two. "Does that make you feel superior?" - a perfect retort to the Doctor.

Part Three of the Pandorica Speech

Part Four. For some reason I don't have "anything to lose"...

Part 5. "Are you very angry?" Another excellent question from Alice.

Gallifrey with A.L.I.C.E.:

Roses:

The Master:

On NOT being a stalker:

And finally, a little quip:

Farscape first, then. The show is basically about an American Arthur Dent fellow named John Crichton who crash-lands during an experimental flight into a living ship named Moya. (Moya and the TARDIS have quite a few similarities, but I’ll talk about that later.)

Crichty and his girlfriend. With guns.

Moya carries a few passengers as well. We have the second main protagonist, Aeryn Sun, who is an ex-Peacekeeper, a semi-corrupt group of authorities who, though they may keep the peace, they sure as hell don’t do it peacefully. Aeryn is initially very cold and unforgiving towards Crichty (read: she often kicks his butt), but later she warms to him (read: becomes his girlfriend). Crichty is forced to choose his priorities. What is more important to him, a way out or a girlfriend?

Also on the ship are D’Argo (or, as I call him, swordy beardy guy… I’ve never been good with names) and his (blue) girlfriend, Zhaan. D’Argo is rather moody, good with his snazzy sword/gun, and has a dark n’ mysterious past.

Zhaan is pretty darn awesome. She’s psychic, is the only one who actually comforts Crichty early on, also has a dark and mysterious past, and has all kinds of special powers, like painting someone’s “soul painting”. She’s a priest, which can get annoying when she starts preaching (example: episode four, in which she tells us that drugs are bad), but she can also kick butt. I think she’s my favorite character so far, but keep in mind I’ve only watched five episodes.

On to Rygel. The puppet. Everyone hates him, and I agree. Well, I love to hate him, and I think that’s intentional. He eats all the ship’s food. He steals an essential part of the ship to use as a jewel on his scepter. He farts helium. He seems to be the one character who will never change, and I suppose it’s nice to have a constant. Even if that constant is one of the the most annoying, bothersome pests in the known galaxy.

Moya and her Pilot bear quite a few similarities to the TARDIS and hers. Moya has a similar interior to the 9th and 10th Doctors’ TARDIS; amber, aquamarine/green, and some black.

Int. Moya...

...Int. TARDIS.

Something I need to do right about now: Fan-fic about Moya and the TARDIS meeting and bragging about their respective pilots. I love them both.

And now, some semi-lucid commentary about each episode, up to “PK Tech Girl.”

Episode 1 (Premiere):

“Whoa, that’s big.” – John Crichton

Evil dude (Crais) has a goatee and a stiff ponytail, so he must be evil! Also, this charming comment from him shows his character well: “I don’t care about casualties!”

Future Doctor Who plotline, inspired by Crichty and Aeryn’s interactions: River Song beats the Doctor the hell up.

On the soundtrack: OMG, it’s Katherine Jenkins!

Seriously, how did Aeryn and Crichty get out with a FORK?

Things that are important to Mr. Crichton: hot chicks, getting back to earth, cool big things.

Things that are not important to Mr. Crichton: “Science”, fellahs with swords, blue bald chicks.

Crais has an evil black fez!

Episode 2 (Exodus From Genesis):

“It’s kinda minty.” – Another brilliant observation from John.

Crichton is Winnie-the-Pooh… but I doubt there’s anyone in the Hundred Acre Wood who beats the crap out of Pooh.

*BONK* *BONK* *BONK* *BONK* Now that’s how you kill a bug.

Crichty – “OMG she’s not beating the crap out of me, something is terribly wrong!”

CLONEY TIME! You know, last time I saw cloney time it didn’t involve the clone and clonee brawling like this. Just a bit of tortured screaming.

The puppet gets an epic speech.

CLONES OF CRICHTY, AND THEY’RE ALL SO STUDMUFFIN-Y!

“You picked the wrong species to screw around with.” – hell yeah, even though he’s totally wrong.

Episode 3 (Back And Back And Back To The Future):

Oh great, says Crichty, it’s the third episode and I’m already a Time Lord.

eww. eww. eww. eww. eww. eww. eww.

EWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWW!

Stop. Talking. Like. That, Anything That Moves lady. Are you Captain Jack? Seriously, stop.

“What’s wrong with Crichton?” (I’m paraphrasing) “He is Crichton.” – Crowning Moment Of Awesomeness

Oh noes, female Captain Jack is trying to seduce my girlfriend!

IT’S GROUNDHOG DAY! Except executed well and with 100% more puppets.

What was a nightmare for the rest of the crew was merely “dinner” for Rygel.

Episode 4 (Throne For A Loss):

Drugs are bad! No, yeah, but they’re kinda necessary. Also: *preach* *preach* [1 1/2 hours later] Oh, I guess we’re a bit preachy. Sorry about that.

Episode 5 (PK Tech Girl):

PK Tech Girl == Rory’s girlfriend from The Rebel Flesh/The Almost People. I  wonder if she’ll get killed, cloned, or mutated into a giant thingie?

“I try to save a life a day.” What lofty goals you have, Crichty!

Hot Peacekeeper vs. Tepid Peacekeeper… this is a tricky one.

So, a few little artsy Who-y things? Indeed.

UPDATE 6/20/11! Under the cut.

Spoilers!

Firstly, Rory Williams. He’s become brilliant, through all the dying. And to steal something from Rory Williams is the New Chuck Norris,

“Death once had a near-Rory experience.”

Dark!Eleven! Yay.

It is, you know.

A mystery for you…

And, yes, that is our entire eighth grade class. I go to a small school.

So, yeah, I just graduated from 8th grade, even though I’m in 7th. Technically. It’s complicated.

But the feat of the night has to be that I GOT THE GUYS TO WEAR BOW TIES! I mean, middle school boys, the most informal people in the universe, right? But they recognised that bow ties are cool. Forever.

Meet Dominic, who is rocking a bowtie. Oh, and me too.

You know, the true wisdom of the 11th Doctor is enigmatic and elusive at first, but now everyone understands… it takes an earthshaking event like this to know that these words are eternally true:

Amy: “Bowtie! Get rid!”

The Doctor: “Bowties. Are. Cool.”

From “The Lodger”. It made an impression on Craig, and it made an impression on these young boys. Oh, it feels good to change people’s lives for the better.

Ohhh, and also, my AWESOME drama teacher wore a fez!!! (My parents bought it for her, it was all very secret… but a total surprise to me.)